Magistrate: Sir, are you ready to proceed?
Tenant: Yes.
Magistrate: Did you receive this notice date March 7?
Tenant: No, I only found out about this from the Subpoena.
Magistrate: Mr. Kruse, did you post this notice?
LLMan: Yes sir. Posted on the front door personally on the date specified in the Notice. See photo of Notice taped to door.
Magistrate: Mr. Kruse, was the tenant behind in the rent at the date of Notice and are they still behind?
LLMan: Yes sir.
Magistrate: Sir, do you have anything to say?
Tenant: Yes. I would like to request an attorney.
Magistrate: I thought you said that you were ready to proceed.
Tenant: That was before I thought I was going to loose.
Ok, now my attorney and I stop paying attention for a minute because we are trying to keep from laughing, but there was something said by the Magistrate about waiving counsel.
Magistrate: Do you understand the terms of your lease?
Tenant: I never received a copy of the lease, so I have no idea what it says.
Magistrate: When did you move in?
Tenant: January, I think.
Magistrate: Mr. Kruse?
LLMan: Sir the tenant moved in, according to the lease he signed, on October 7, 2006. I have a copy if you would like to review it.
Magistrate: Sir, it appears that you have a lease in place that outlines your payment obligations.
LLMan: Your Honor, I would like to point out that the former representative of the owner, who signed the lease on behalf of the owner, is this gentleman's sister.
Magistrate: Is this correct?
Tenant: No sir. I am an only child, however I do know Theresa. After she and her husband moved from their previous apartment, they moved in with me.
Magistrate: So, the person who signed your lease on behalf of the owner is not your sister, but she is currently living with you?
Tenant: Yes.
Magistrate: And you are telling me that you don't know that you need to pay rent? Don't answer that. I am ruling.............
I can't make up stuff this good!!
Do you have questions about distressed assets, receivership or bankruptcy sales, auctions? Email me at rfk@gryphonusa.com and I'll try to answer it in an upcoming post.
Richard F. Kruse is the President of Columbus, Ohio based Gryphon USA, Ltd. (www.gryphonusa.com). The Gryphon Organization includes Gryphon Asset Management providing receivership and consulting services in the distressed marketplace, United Country Gryphon Realty & Auction Group (www.ucohiorealty.com & www.ucohioauctions.com) providing real estate brokerage and auction services throughout Ohio and OnlineAuctionUSA.com (www.onlineauctionusa.com) providing commercial asset liquidations from the Midwest to East Coast.
United Country Gryphon Realty & Auction Career Opportunities Available. Call 614-885-0020 x 17
Now that is very funny. LOL "That was before I thought I was going to loose". LOL LOL
Thanks for the comments, all.
Danny - This is the first time I have had this particular series of excuses, but "I did't know" is typical.
Next week I have the lady who will only move out "when the man from the court" drags her out.
The week after, I have two families of gang members. The bangers were suppoed to be yesterday too, but the Baliff that was supposed to serve the subpoenas is retiring on Friday. He pretty much "stopped working" last month, so we didn't get good service.
Rich-
"Tenant: That was before I thought I was going to loose."
That has got to be one of the best ones I've heard of in a long time!
Did you actually manage to keep from laughing your a$$ off in court?
Rich,
You meet a lot of nice people in court, the clerk, the bailiff, half the attorneys, and the judges. I even meet a nice defendant, ONCE!
Welcome to the wonderful world of Land lording. You're still in the people business!
Bill
Been there, done that.
I have learned...
No leases unless I have to in order to satisfy gov. rent subsidy programs.
If something is broken, fix it.
If I have to serve a summons and don't wish to hire a process server, I get a third party to do it and have them sign an affidavit of service (as per NY law) I ALSO serve by mail... Certified mail.
If I "nail" to door, I also send by Certified mail.
"Nail and Mail"
I don't know about anywhere else, but where I am, evictions are simply a "time game". So don't waste time getting the filings submitted. 30 days after the next rent period is a defining date. So if putting a service off, puts you past the 1st, you lose an additional month.
Hey Rich...that one was good. With 26 rental properties myself, I've heard them all. I will tell you something that HAS actually worked well for me in the past year or so. I've actually began PAYING the people to move out. I'll put them up in a budget hotel for a couple of weeks, or just give them cash after they have cleaned all their stuff up and left. At first, it was a stab in the heart to do so, but after adding up court costs, the 90 days lost rent, the cleaning/hauling bills, it became increasingly clear that I was better off giving them an incentive to move out quickly and cleanly. One of the requirements I have is that they clean the place up and take EVERYTHING.
Believe it or not, almost everytime I've offered this to somone that I need out, they've taken me up on the offer and it's worked out better for me in the long run.
Tony,
I hear you, but I don't have the time or patience. Here's $300 to move. Ok, I'll be out on Monday. Monday comes. No move. They need another day... Same ol, same ol. Every time.